During tough economic times like these, it is becoming more and more impossible to decipher whether or not Sugar Daddy’s excuses are legitimate. What was once nothing more than a casual concern has escalated into one of the hottest topics up for debate between Sugar Daddies and their perplexed Sugar Babies worldwide.

Of course a little jealousy is normal (and healthy), but how do you know if he is truly busy? Being beautiful is hard enough without having to worry about what he’s up to, and obviously the last thing you’d want is to lose him to another Sugar Baby, who quite frankly may be hotter or more entertaining than you! So how do you know if his excuses are legit?

Every successful Sugar Daddy has to put in the time to make the money. If you doubt his excuse for not being able to see you then do some research (and I’m not talking about the kind where you make harassing phone calls or unannounced visits to his office). During dinner, casually ask him what he’s working on, appear interested and try to find out what has his attention at the office.

Hopefully it won’t be that busty blonde that sits at the front desk! The truth is, you may never know what someone else is up to, but if you feel his excuses start to overlap or if they just seem a bit shoddy, you’ve got to investigate.

Sitting home worrying about losing your Sugar Daddy is never a good thing. You’ve got to remind him why he chose you as his Sugar Baby, and why you never want him to stop being your Sugar Daddy. If during your research you discover that he is lagging because he does in fact have other Sugar Babies it may be time to re-evaluate the arrangement.

But remember, most of all, there are plenty of other Sugar Daddies out there waiting to spoil you!

Myths, urban legends and politics all make for great talk at cocktails parties. Just don’t take any of them too seriously.

Sugar Daddy dating has put more women through college than the GI Bill, it’s given retired businessmen a reason to keep going to the gym, and it’s one of the few sectors of the economy that seems to be recession-proof.

But like any great concept there are bound to be naysayers. Some people just don’t get it and instead of keeping an open mind they find it more satisfying to perpetuate negative stereotypes and misinformation.

These are the same people that told us if you threw a penny off of the Empire State Building it would kill someone and that if the woman stayed on top during sex she couldn’t get pregnant.

Here are a few myths and misunderstandings about Sugar Daddy dating that need to be addressed.

Sugar Daddy Dating is Just Veiled Prostitution

This is one is my favorites because it’s the craziest. Comparing the two is like claiming that watching porn is committing adultery.

Sugar Daddy dating is just that, a form of dating. Whether it’s referred to as an arrangement or an affair, Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies are doing a lot more together than just having sex. Sure there is sex, a lot of it, but there is just as much partying, hanging out, shopping and traveling.

Last time I checked men didn’t take prostitutes on vacation to Aspen, they didn’t make their car payments for them and they certainly didn’t show them off to their friends.

Sugar Babies Are Gold Diggers and Opportunists

This myth was created by actual gold diggers and opportunists. Sugar Babies are generally young women with a strong sense of self-worth who like to party. Unlike their deceptive counterparts, Saccharin Babies, Sugar Babies put their cards on the table when they meet a Sugar Daddy and spell out exactly what they need in order to make the arrangement work.

Inversely, the Saccharin Baby will hide her intentions and string a guy along with a lot of empty promises. She never comes out and says what she is looking for because she lacks the Sugar Baby’s self-confidence.

Sugar Daddies are Dirty Old Men

I never really understood what people meant by this one since they fail to define what constitutes a Dirty Old Man. Sugar Daddies may be older, sure, but dirty, I don’t think so. This myth is the standard jealousy-based smear campaign initiated by people who would outlaw great sex if they could.

If a guy is north of 50, still has a sex drive and the financial means to attract a hot younger woman, he should get a trophy and The Discovery Channel should do a documentary on how he got so lucky.

Sugar Daddies are generally more polished and sophisticated than they were in their 20’s or 30’s because they’ve got EXPERIENCE. They’re also more appreciative of women than younger guys are.

Sugar Daddy Dating is Degrading to Women

If that’s the case than so is Elle Magazine, Victoria’s Secret models and the stiletto heal shoe.

People can’t be degraded unless they are deprived of the ability to make their own decisions. Sugar Babies do their own thinking, call their own shots and CHOOSE the man they want to tool around town with in the drop top Mercedes.

Degrading is having to work a job you despise in order to pay for basic living expenses or staying in a loveless marriage because you can’t afford to move on with your life.

So have at it Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies, don’t let myths and misconceptions stand in your way of finding the perfect playmate.

Power to the players.

There’s a new joke going around. It goes something like, “Tiger Woods hit a tree with his car and a bunch of women fell out.”

Sounds cute, but now the poor guy is knee deep is allegations of infidelity with about a dozen Sugar Babies, there’s talk of hush money that he doled out by the wheelbarrow and even speculation that he’s paying his wife Elin Nordegren $5,000,000 just to stay with him. How can this story get any worse? Well it can.

Mindy Lawton, a busty Florida brunette and one of Tiger’s Sugar Babies is quoted as saying that “Sometimes I looked like a rag doll after we’d made love.” She also divulged that Tiger was “well-endowed” and into marathon S&M romps.

As if that weren’t bad enough, she went on to say that “He really did like it rough. He wanted to spank me and loved pulling my hair as we had sex,” she told the News of the World. “He also liked me to talk dirty to him, but hair-pulling was what really turned him on.”

These are details that we can all live without, but that’s not the point. Lawton broke the Sugar Baby code of silence and by betraying her beloved Tiger she betrayed every Sugar Daddy, past, present or future. She also betrayed Sugar Babies as a collective, leaving the world to believe that any Sugar Baby will spill the beans on her Sugar Daddy if the price is right.

How do we move on from here? One step at a time people, one step at a time.

Most Sugar Daddies are not Tiger Woods, and consequently are not nearly as susceptible to exploitation by the media. Secondly, Tiger has to eat a little of the blame here. It sounds like he may have promised his Sugar Babies a little more than he could deliver.

More than one of Tiger’s Sugar Babies was convinced she was going to be the next Mrs. Woods. Whether he really lead them on or not is difficult to say. But even if he did make some shaky promises in the heat of the moment, that still doesn’t give any Sugar Baby the right to break her vow of silence.

When a Sugar Daddy affiliates with a Sugar Baby he has the same expectation of confidentiality as when he deals with his an attorney, psychiatrist or barber. What goes on in Sugar Daddy land, stays there, or at least it’s supposed to. However, with the aforementioned debacle in mind, it’s important to make sure your Sugar Baby truly understands the code of silence she is supposed to maintain, whether you two are together or not.

Sugar Daddy Soundproofing

The term “gag order” is a little harsh, so we’re going to refer to Sugar Daddy confidentiality as “soundproofing.” The best time to start process this is at the beginning of the arrangement. Get started on the right foot so you don’t have to change direction after things are rolling. Be prepared to ask the tough questions.

For instance, “Honey, if you found out I was dating a dozen or so other Sugar Babies, would you go to the press or release a YouTube video about our sex life?”

Sure, there’s maybe a few different ways to couch this question but it does get the point across. You can tell by Sugar Baby’s answer if she’s going to hold up under interrogation at a later date. If she can’t give you a straight answer or you see that her pupils have dilated (nature’s way of telling you you’re in danger) it may be time to find a more discreet Sugar Baby.

Sugar Baby’s response to this question should be rather unemotional, borderlining on tepid. She has to be able to look you dead in the eye without even the slightest hesitation, and assure you that whatever transpires between the two of you, no matter how twisted, she is willing to take it to the grave.

People are people, and when feelings get hurt everyone has the impulse to lash out. The question is whether or not we act on that fleeting impulse.

In closing, confidentiality is a double edged sword, it cuts both ways. However, rest assured that the Sugar Baby code of silence is not dead; it’s just a little bruised.

25,000 B.C., Tuesday

Cave paintings discovered in Lascaux, France depict two cave men. The first one is being berated by his unruly cave wife for being a lousy hunter and the second one is draped in animal pelts, surrounded by adoring cave hotties (also draped in animal pelts) who are ambitiously working to satisfy his primitive Sugar Daddy needs.

Ironically, a second set of cave paintings from the same region depict the aforementioned disgruntled cave wife living large in the upper west side after her divorce attorney got through shellacking her non-pelt-providing cave husband.

134 A.D., The Golden Age of Rome

Roman Emperor Antoninus kicks Sugar Daddy dating up a notch when he commissions the city’s top engineers to invent the hot tub, the smoking jacket and Vodka. Following in his steps future Emperors go on to pioneer the creation of the convertible, the American Express Platinum Card, the cigarette holder and Jello shots.

922 A.D. Feudal Japan

Japanese men realize that the guy who can afford the best rice wine and fish heads is the same one hogging all the best women. They band together to form an elite ruling class called the “Sake Daddies” and vow to win these women back by showering them in silk robes and pearls – the Geisha is born!

The Sake Daddies also hire artisans to carve thousands of small ivory sculptures in order to immortalize their exploits. Go figure.

1522 England

Henry VIII showed western civilization how a real Sugar Daddy lives by initiating what will later become known as “the rotation.” Henry kept so many Sugar Babies waiting in the wings that HBO eventually gave him his own series. He had a good run but died, not from loneliness, in 1547.

1790 America

Yes indeed, George Washington was a PROLIFIC Sugar Daddy. He was also so adept at keeping his arrangements on the down low that the only things history remembers him for is chopping down the cherry tree and having wooden teeth.

George’s single greatest contribution to the Sugar Daddy lifestyle was establishing the “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. After a few pints he was known to quip to friends that “What Martha doesn’t know won’t hurt her.” Washington also pioneered the concept of Brown Sugar which the Rolling Stones later immortalized in their classic hit.

1876 Cambridge, Massachusetts, United States

Once again, sex is responsible for the greatest invention of the 20th century, the telephone. Alexander Graham Bell realized that if Sugar Daddies were to live the lifestyle with any degree of convenience, they were going to need a quick and easy way to contact their Sugar Babies without dispatching a loose-lipped courier or taking a high-profile carriage ride across town.

Although married to Mabel Hubbard for more than 45 years, Bell learned early on that tech geeks make the best Sugar Daddies. Legend has it that he preferred the pay-as-you-go approach for his Sugar babies as opposed to a fixed monthly budget due to the fact that he was busy fighting off more than 600 lawsuits that challenged his patent on the telephone. However, it should be noted that he later went the extra mile and invented the metal detector after one of his playmates lost her custom broach during a romp in on Mass beach.

Is the Jackie of All Trades better than the dream team of specialist Sugar Babies? Is it more enjoyable to have one Sugar Baby that can ski the black diamond slopes as well as she can fill out a Brazilian t-back, or to have a virtual arsenal of Sugar Babies, each one equipped with her own special skill set?

The answer to that question depends on the Sugar Daddy and of course, the depth of his pocket. For the average man, handling two women is like trying to drive two cars, it sounds great on paper but there is a lot of stopping and starting.

But the Sugar Daddy is anything but average. He is the master of industry, the man who made his first million before he was 30, the very same guy who got his pilot’s license just because the grouper in the Bahamas tastes better than the variety they serve in Miami.

Of course more is better. Or is it?

Lance (not his real name) has been seeing the same Sugar Baby for two years. He’s the out-of-town guy that shows up like Santa Clause when he wants to unwind. The majority of nights with his girl are spent out on the town, not clubbing till 5:00 a.m. but more along the lines of wine bars and Jazz clubs. He likes the stability and the consistency of the relationship.

Did I mention that Lance is also happily married with two children?

“I really don’t want to start talking about right and wrong here,” Lance said candidly. “All I can tell you is what works for me. Having more than one Sugar Baby would be ludicrous. Jasmine (obviously not her real name) is my solace, my getaway and someone I trust to keep our arrangement just between us.”

A lot of Sugar Daddies are like lance. They don’t need to be the king of Sugar Mountain, but they still like the arrangement scene. For the record, Lance’s marriage is rock solid by all practical definition. He has no intention of leaving his wife or leaving Jasmine (still not her real name). He’s a happy man.

Lance has a rather consistent financial arrangement with Sugar Baby. He deposits a specific amount of cash into a checking account every month and that takes care of Jasmine’s rent, phone and essentials. When he comes into town there are nights out, some shopping, but it’s a rather conservative deal.

Which brings us to Cameron. He’s got a lot of time to fill since selling his software company but now he lives his life like he’s the subject of a documentary on living like a rock star. For Cam, the cameras are always rolling.

He’s got a Hatteras that costs more than most people’s homes, has never been married (and seems to be keeping it that way at least for the foreseeable future), and has lots of friends. His only Achilles heel is boredom.

Cam keeps three Sugar Babies in rotation at all times. He’s the perfect delegator. He’s got a travel baby, a club baby and even one he keeps around because she’s a deep water certified scuba diver (really). For a stretch there was even one Sugar Baby in the mix whose sole qualification was that she was a Maxim Girl.

He’s not exactly paying the freight for all three but they all do very well. It’s a pay-as- you-go arrangement as opposed to a defined monthly budget. The girls make out with lots of news clothes, spa days, salon days, flat screen TV’s, bathroom renovations, and anything else you can think of that costs money.

“I’ll admit I am a chronic type A,” Cam Said. “Whether I’m working or playing it’s at full speed. It’s just the way I am.”

As unorthodox as either arrangement may sound, it’s all a matter of perspective. If they were to switch places even for a brief period of time, Cam would be so bored he’d start another software company and Lance’s head would just explode.

So in the end, which arrangement is better? The answer is both and neither. It all depends on the Sugar Daddy and what he’s looking for out of his arrangement (or arrangements).

Imagine you’re a beautiful shining star, luminescent and bright, sending beams of radiant light and energy out into the universe for millions of light years. You are impressive and unforgettable in every way, but an astronomer has yet to discover you. The only thing standing in your way of being noticed is that you are surrounded by tens of thousands of other bright, shiny stars.

Sugar Babies are a lot like undiscovered shining stars; they are beautiful, unique and radiant, but they are surrounded by thousands of other Sugar Babies trying to attract the attention of that perfect Sugar Daddy.

If you know what Sugar Daddies look for in Sugar Babies you’ll be able to set yourself apart from the rest of the thousands of other shining stars in the night sky.

Sugar Daddies Want Convenience

Convenience and efficiency constitute the driving force behind Sugar Daddy Dating. Remove either one of these elements and the Sugar Daddy, as well as the Sugar Baby, are back to throwing darts at a board.

Stress the convenience of your situation when corresponding with your Sugar Daddy. Use terminology like, “available for spontaneous get-togethers,” or “my bikini is already packed.” As always, be yourself and make sure your personality comes through in the process.

Sugar Daddies Crave Approval

The Sugar Daddy is usually a self-made man, nothing was ever handed to him and the reason he has attained a certain degree of success is because of innovation, dedication and concentration. Express an interest in his business pursuits without being too invasive and let him know you’re impressed.

Sure he may have made his fortune in coat hangers or tube socks, but an empire is still and empire no matter how you slice it. Give your Sugar Daddy a pat on the back, or at the very least, an understanding nod. Acknowledge his accomplishments and it will come back to you ten-fold.

Sugar Daddies Require Certain Skills in a Sugar Baby

Beauty will get your foot in the door, but the Sugar Baby who can spin more than one plate at a time ups her appeal and her longevity.

By talent we’re not referring to your ability to debug a home computer.

Sought after Sugar Baby talents include;

Keen Fashion Sense – Sugar Daddies generally don’t have time to keep up with what’s hot and what’s not in terms of fashion. Demonstrate your ability to navigate the men’s department at Barneys or Nordstrom’s and you’ve been promoted from Sugar Baby to fashion consultant. This particular skill set works on several levels because if you’re shopping for him, well, you’re not going home empty-handed either.

I-Phone Blackberry Proficiency – There is no single greater aggravation to a Sugar Daddy than the non-texting, no e-mail having, technologically illiterate Sugar Baby. The Sugar Baby/Sugar Daddy dynamic hinges on text messages, e-photos and other quick, short and sometimes erotic communications. Keep up with the latest in e-communications.

Activity Planner – Sugar Daddy’s are busy people, and without the right Sugar Baby to show them how to have a good time there is a distinct possibility they’re going to miss out on all the fun. It’s up to you, the free-spirited and vivacious Sugar Baby to know the best clubs, restaurants and romantic hideaways. Show me a Sugar Baby who knows where to rent Jet Ski’s at 11:00 p.m. on a Friday night at the Jersey Shore and I’ll show you a Sugar Baby who’s got wealthy suitors lining up around the block.

Sugar Daddies Love Independent Sugar Babies

No one likes clutchers. Sugar Daddies in particular are dynamic and independent, and since like attracts like, it only makes sense that the Sugar Baby who resides at the center of her own universe is going to get the guy. Independent Sugar Babies bring excitement, experience, charm and social skills into the equation.

Sugar Daddies, wealthy men, established men, call them what you will, have discriminating taste and are fiercely competitive. They need to know they’re getting the very best.

Plan your moves, exercise your creativity and blow them all away with your newfound Sugar Baby talents. You’ll be happy you did.

WealthSeeksBeauty.com would like to take this opportunity to extend its hand to professional golfer Tiger Woods by offering him a complimentary lifetime Sugar Daddy membership. Since we provide discretion and anonymity to wealthy and famous men we can assure that Tiger maintains the privacy he deserves while enjoying the Sugar Daddy lifestyle.

As far as international media coverage is concerned, Tiger Woods has effectively made the leap from professional golf icon to Sugar Daddy extraordinaire. His alleged sexual exploits with hot younger women have officially overshadowed his legendary prowess on the links. Although hostess to the stars Rachel Uchitel has denied any inappropriate involvement with Tiger Woods, a rather explicit voice mail message allegedly left by him for 24-year old Los Angeles cocktail waitress Jaimee Grubbs is now circulating through the media like a brushfire through Malibu.

“Hey, it’s Tiger. I need you to do me a huge favor. Can you please take your name off your phone? My wife went through my phone and may be calling you. So if you can, please take your name off that. Just have it as a number on the voicemail. You got to do this for me. Huge. Quickly. Bye.”

The authenticity of this message is still being questioned, but we at WealthSeeksBeauty.com can only think of two guys named Tiger, and the other one sells breakfast cereal. Whether this phone message is legitimate or not, what Sugar Daddy needs this kind of press?

Tiger has just joined the illustrious ranks of David Lettermen, former New York Governor Elliot Spitzer, former presidential candidate Gary Hart, Kobe Bryant, South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford, Hugh Grant, Eddie Murphy and about a hundred other alright guys who just caught a bad break.

In our own professional opinion Tiger Woods is simply just another well-intentioned Sugar Daddy in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong waitress. Sugar Daddies are eternal optimists; they like to believe in the best in people. The only thing they are guilty of is just having too much love.

Once again, a little forethought goes a long way. Tiger, if you’re reading this, contact us immediately and we’ll take good care of you.

By: WSBNews@11:00

My Mother was the epitome of old world conservative, or so it seemed until you met her Mother.

My Grandmother loved to tell stories about how she conveniently lost messages when “boys called on the phone” for my Mother. As far as she was concerned, suitors were supposed to come for family dinners and dates were supposed to be chaperoned. My Mother had her own ideas.

My Mother, in turn, believed it was irreverent for my sister’s dates to honk when they pulled into the driveway as opposed to coming to the front door and introducing themselves. The reality of the situation was that they were just terrified of my Father, and rightfully so.

The one thing the two generations had in common is that their perspective on how men and women were supposed to interact was steeped in dogma and outright ridiculousness. How anyone had five minutes of fun under those circumstances is a mystery.

There are 6,000,000,000 people on the planet, give or take, and the only thing that the average man or woman needs in order to be happy is to connect with about ten or twelve of them (500 to 1,000 if we’re talking about Charlie Sheen).

We don’t drive to work in horse-drawn carriages anymore, doctors stopped using leeches to cure headaches a while ago and we now know that the Sun is going to rise every morning whether or not we pray to it.

The dating concept deserves the same upgrade as every other aspect of Western civilization.

The Sugar Daddy scene is dating perfected. It’s effective, safe and delivers what it promises. The pretense, posturing and misrepresentation of hit-and-miss dating have been removed, leaving the Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby alike with pure, unadulterated expression of mutual needs.

Last time I checked honest communication was supposed to be the cornerstone of successful relationships.

Sure, Sugar Daddy dating is all about NSA (no strings attached), but in reality two people having the time of their lives on an adrenaline-fueled thrill ride are more likely to find romance than two people on a date chaperoned by my Grandmother.

We couldn’t decide which of these headlines was better so we used both of them;

From an engineering standpoint, a love triangle should be a stable structure. After all, the great pyramids of Egypt are a triangle and they’ve stood for more than 4,000 years. Then again, the pyramids aren’t constructed of a husband with a rogue libido, an exceptionally young coworker, and an irate wife.

Statistically, a man of means is more apt to engage in a sexual dalliance than Joe Lunch Box. Don’t get me wrong, Joe Lunch Box may still duck into a strip club on boy’s night out, but the reasons that the nine-to-five guy is less likely to stray is simple; he has less expendable cash and he’s just too damn tired.

For the sake of fairness we have to state that not all men in power cheat on their spouses. It’s just that the serial monogamists don’t generate the same amount of press as David Lettermen and Kobe Bryant.

Wealth Seeks Beauty is not endorsing marital infidelity nor are we here to offer a “how to” manual on getting some on the side. But people (men and woman alike) are biologically wired to crave sex. Literature has chronicled the trials and tribulations of this particular human trait for thousands of years.

In Homer’s Odyssey, Odysseus knew the lethal peril of the Sirens’ song. He knew for an indisputable FACT that NO MAN could resist their intoxicating melody. Odysseus realized that if he did nothing his crew would most likely meet their demise by leaping into the sea and that his ship would be destroyed by being run onto the rocks upon being lured by the call of the Sirens.

The Internet hadn’t caught on yet in 800 B.C. so Odysseus, the keen strategist, did the best he could with what he had. He instructed his crew to plug their ears with wax before they passed near the island of the Sirens but here comes the kicker. Even knowing the lethality of the Sirens’ song, HE STILL WANTED TO HEAR IT. Odysseus instructed his crew to lash him to the mast of the ship and not to cut him loose until he stopped begging and pleading, until the Sirens’ island was way far in the rear view mirror.

This scenario says it all. Odysseus knew for a fact that all those who came before him DIED from hearing the Sirens; not a few, or most, ALL of them were destroyed. Odysseus still decided it was probably OK for him to give it a go.

If Odysseus actually existed and were alive today, he would have been a kick-ass Sugar Daddy. Being a man’s man he probably would have hooked up his crew as well. He would have painted “WealthSeeksBeauty.com” on the side of his boat and spread the Sugar Daddy philosophy as he fought the Cyclops and took on all comers during his adventures.

Getting back to modern times.

Kobe, A-Rod, Peter Cook (Christie Brinkley’s ex hubby), and Michael Jordan could have avoided the tidal waves of emotional and financial devastation they created by just being realistic about their human foibles. Like Odysseus, they knew that those who came before them were raked over the coals for such behavior, but they spun the wheel anyway.

Sugar Daddy relationships are the single most effective societal safety valve we have today. A little Sugar alleviates the pressure of rogue desire before it builds up and takes out a city block when it explodes.
Think about it; the Sugar Daddy lifestyle is far more prevalent in Europe than in the U.S. Consequently, the overwhelming majority of sex scandals that rock the evening news are home grown.

When a well-intentioned Sugar Daddy establishes an arrangement with a young, beautiful and DISCREET Sugar Baby, families are spared embarrassment, corporations and fortunes remain intact, and the media is left with nothing to report on.

An ounce of Sugar is worth a pound of attorneys.

Not much has changed since the days when the first caveman dragged a saber tooth tiger pelt back to the lair to attract the favors of Wilma Flintstone. This simple exchange of essentials for affection set the pace for the next ten thousand years; except that now a diamond tennis bracelet gets a man further than a greasy animal hide.

Regardless of whether the Alpha Dog comes bearing animal skins or diamonds, odds are that he is not going to bed alone any time soon. This is why no one ever talks about the Beta Dog.

So why fight ten millennium of biological programming?

Woman are beautiful and amazingly complex individuals, but if given the choice of dating a man with good intentions and dating a man with good intentions and $5,000,000 in the bank, they’re going with the smart-money bet.

Women have one distinct ability that men do not, the ability to create life. Hence, they are more intuitive and even if they don’t have baby-on-the-brain, they are still thinking about the future while men are thinking about the here and now.

Women, regardless of their socioeconomic status, are simply not attracted to slackers. Recent university studies have even concluded that a woman’s degree of sexual satisfaction is directly linked to her partner’s level of financial success. Apparently size does matter.

Which brings us to men.

Men, for the most part, are raised in a football society. They are hard-wired to gain ground at all costs, push through barriers, and believe that the ultimate satisfaction is to be hoisted victoriously upon the shoulders of their peers and showered by the cheers and adulation of the roaring crowd. Even the most mild-mannered intellectual has this message screaming at him incessantly from the base of his brain.

Caveman thinking is what builds skyscrapers, put a man on the moon, and gave us cell phones with Internet access. If that first caveman didn’t risk his life to kill the saber tooth tiger to win over the sought-after cave Hottie, Sugar Daddy dating wouldn’t be the rage that it is today.

The art of the arrangement GUARANTEES that everyone comes away a winner. It’s the perfect storm of negotiated romance; the men with the most get the women with the most to offer. Now, because of the Internet, everyone gets to play.

The best aspect of Caveman Selection is that it only grows stronger as people mature. People don’t mellow with age; they become more focused on what they want. Women become more conscious about their financial needs, men grow more confident from accumulating life experience and everyone is a LOT more direct about sex; their need for it, the quality of it and the frequency they get it.

This is not to say that we’re all just a bunch of horny cave people. Men and women also have intangible intellectual and emotional needs that must be satisfied in order to be truly happy. We all walk a fine line between caveman and Renaissance man.

But when push comes to shove, the caveman bearing gifts is going to win out over the empty handed Neanderthal.