We SWORE in our last blog that we weren’t going to write about Kristen Stewart again, so this one is about Rupert Sanders.
The media is so intrigued with this guy right now that if a six-year-old kid from Texarkana invented a calorie-free butter substitute that also cured cancer and baldness he still wouldn’t get as much press coverage. It’s amazing how much attention one guy can get for just doing what guys are programmed to do; go after a hot, albeit confused, 22-year-old brunette with a buttocks as luscious as a ripe mango.
Men are like feral dogs when left unsupervised, and this guy should really get a pass so we can focus on more important issues like that Mars rover thing or the new prime time re-hash of Dallas. But that’s not going to happen any time soon so we at WSB may as just keep the ball rolling.
Here we go.
Just today we released a story entitled “WealthSeeksBeauty.com Offers $10,000 Shopping Spree to Sugar Babies Who Dated Rupert Sanders.” That’s right, $10,000 in designer shoes to the first Sugar Baby who comes forward to WSB and reveal that she too took the walk of shame after dating Hollywood director Sanders.
There is simply no way that this guy closed Kristen Stewart as a first time Sugar Daddy, he’s had some batting practice elsewhere and we intend to find out with whom. The lucky Sugar Baby may have not hit the lotto with Sanders but she certainly will with us. Last time we crunched the numbers, $10,000 buys a lot of shoes, even at Salvatore Ferragamo in Beverly Hills. With this in mind, our proposal gets even better.
The currently unknown Sugar Baby, let’s call her Sugar Baby X, will be featured on our home page and afforded the opportunity to showcase her attributes to a multitude of international benefactors while we keep her identity confidential if she so desires. The confidentiality part will most likely be an exercise in futility because by the time we discover the identity of Sugar Baby X she’ll already be represented by Gloria Allred and cutting a movie deal with HBO for her life rights.
Rupert Sanders worked the “Business Mentor Sugar Daddy” approach with Stewart and she was powerless to resist. Plus he’s British so whatever he says, no matter how inane, sounds really cool, especially to a 22-year-old girl. The most surprising thing we learned about Rupert Sanders throughout this entire tabloid meltdown was that his wife, actress and model Liberty Ross, is also slamming hot beyond belief. It’s ridiculous. What is so irresistible about this guy?
If you look at pictures of Liberty Ross from ten years ago (she’s 34 now) she may not look exactly like Kristen Stewart but she most definitely possessed the same sultry brunette Goth persona. Rupert Sanders most definitely has a “type.”
In the same fashion that FBI profilers can create a psychological profile of a serial killer, we at WSB have the ability to construct a highly probable description of Sugar Baby X. We expect that she’ll be about 27, thin, brunette and an aspiring actress with a serious Sugar Daddy fixation. Odds are, since Hollywood is a very small town, she’s either already in the public eye to one extent or another and is still in casual contact with Sanders.
Sugar Baby X rolled the dice on Sanders because he was well-connected and she was looking for her big break but for one reason or another things just didn’t gel. No big surprise since Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby relationships aren’t designed to stand the test of time and especially the ever-present lens of the sly paparazzi. She’ll most likely be on the verge of coming forward right now, but she’s torn between her fading loyalty to Sanders and the opportunity to be thrust into the public eye in a very big way.
She’s currently living in a West Hollywood apartment, possibly with a roommate, and is still going on casting calls by day while working a night gig at the Viper Room or House of Blues as a hostess and she’ll be rather easy to spot because she’s assuredly the hottest brunette in the room with small but commanding natural breasts.
If you’re reading this blog right now Sugar Baby X, you’re just an email away from $10,000 in Ferragamo shoes, some well-deserved time in the spotlight and possibly a feature spread in Playboy.
If Rupert Sanders was a forward thinker he would just call a first strike press conference and come clean before the story gets out the old fashioned way, via a scene-stealing friend or co-worker who can’t keep quiet and doesn’t have all of the facts straight anyway. This is the same way the Monica Lewinsky scandal went global and it was months before fact and fiction were laboriously separated like conjoined twins sharing a vital organ.
In closing we’d like to assure Sugar Baby X that we have her best interests in mind. We can give her career a boost while treating her with the respect and decency she deserves. Also, and we have to get this in here somewhere, if you’re not Sugar Baby X and are reading this story NOW is the time to logon to WealthSeeksBeauty.com and post your Sugar Daddy profile or Sugar Baby personal ad. You may not walk with $10,000 in shoes but you’ll still be in the game and having the time of your life.
Live like there’s no tomorrow and hook up with the benefactor or benefactress of your choice. Sugar Daddy Dating is not just for the rich and famous anymore.
Admittedly, this topic is getting way too much coverage so this is the last time we are going to ring the same bell, but there’s more to the story now, so let’s hit the highlights and then put this to bed once and for all.
As the entire universe is aware, Bella Swan was recently caught banging hotshot Hollywood director Rupert Sanders. He’s 41 and married; she’s 22 and hot, so on and so forth. It should be known for the record though that it was us at WealthSeeksBeauty.com that rolled up our sleeves and left no stone unturned in our pursuit of the truth, or at least our version of the truth. In reality we took a wild guess and now it appears our theory is actually panning out.
Rupert Sanders is a mature, well-connected Hollywood shot caller who can elevate Kristen Stewart from her teen movie status and catapult her into more complex leading lady roles. Stewart is indeed lovely and talented and will eventually be held in comparison to Elizabeth Taylor, Meryl Streep and Helen Mirren once she gets a few Academy Award dramas under her skimpy thong panties. So she slept with a guy who could benefit her career, so what? Actresses have done this so often and for so long that the term “casting couch” was injected into the public lexicon in order to speed up conversations.
But as the adage goes, “No one goes down a path they haven’t traveled before,” and we at WSB are absolutely convinced that there are other Sugar Daddies who are bound to come forward in the coming weeks. These lucky bastards will reveal that at one time or another, they too took a ride in the carnal bounce house with Stewart so as to grease the wheels of her already promising career.
We are so convinced of this theory that we released a story yesterday entitled, “WealthSeeksBeauty.com Seeking Sugar Daddies Who Dated Kristen Stewart,” not the most original title but it gets the point across.
Our story is floating around out there, permeating every nook and cranny in the Internet and we even kicked it over to TMZ who promptly ignored it. However, our intuition is so strong that we are willing to pony up and offer a free lifetime membership to any Sugar Daddy who has been involved with Stewart; a whopping $15,000 value. We don’t play games here.
Remember the good old days when Tiger Woods had one mistress, then about 40 more popped up out of virtually every major American city that had a golf course? Tiger Woods had so many Sugar Babies come forward that eventually the media stopped referring to them by name and they became known as one giant collective. The same principle applies here; it’s just a matter of time.
Stewart initially claimed that her fling with Sanders was like a two or three-day indiscretion. Now Sanders trusted friends are confirming that he and Stewart dated for at least six months before getting busted on camera. It’s good to have friends that can keep a secret until they have a shot at some press.
Just to reiterate, we at WSB applaud Stewart for being a motivated Sugar Baby and taking the initiative to better herself. Her career is at a critical juncture and it’s imperative that she secures quality projects in order to effectively showcase her impressive acting ability. If she can get a leg up on the competition by dating a mature benefactor who knows all the right people then by all means she should do it. After all, it’s not like she got caught having sex with Tom Sizemore.
As for convincing the unidentified Sugar Daddies to come forward, we know that will be a little tricky since they’re probably happily married with kids and no matter how cool your wife is, she isn’t that cool. There’s no casual way to tell your wife of fifteen years that you ground and pounded a slamming hot 22-year-old hard-bodied starlet without finding yourself on the receiving end of some serious financial blowback.
Sanders’ wife Liberty Ross did indeed take the whole thing in stride though and we credit her for that. However, even if she was livid it would be difficult to notice because her face doesn’t actually move. She’s about as animated as a Macy’s mannequin. Seriously though, Liberty’s amazing ability to rationalize the situation is self-evident; she married a Hollywood director for the same reason that Stewart dated one, it’s just good business. For those of you who don’t already know, Liberty Ross played Snow White’s (Stewart’s) mother in Snow White and the Huntsman. To sum it up, Liberty Ross was Sanders original Sugar Baby. She knew there was bound to be another one from time to time when she married the guy.
So everyone comes out a winner and the trio is getting more press than Neil Armstrong did when he set foot on the moon.
If our intensive search for more of Kristen Stewart’s Sugar Daddies fails to produce any tangible results and no one comes forward, we have no one to blame but ourselves. After all, the precept of Sugar Daddy Dating is anonymity and discretion, but you definitely can’t blame us for trying.
That’s why it’s always good to have a “B Plan” to fall back on.
Our team of crack Sugar Baby Dating experts is already drafting our next press release, “WealthSeeksBeauty.com Seeking Sugar Babies Who Dated Rupert Sanders.” We’ll most likely even offer these currently unknown Sugar Babies profile coverage on our home page, and a gift certificate for some really cool shoes at Salvatore Ferragamo in Beverly Hills.
Regardless of all of the Kristen Stewart hoopla, the time to get into the action and become a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby is now. Logon to WealthSeeksBeauty.com, post your profile and live like the world is going to end tomorrow. Why should celebrities be the only ones who get to have all the real fun?
Sugar Daddy Dating is not always about the money, sometimes it’s about MORE money, and better business connections. When Kristen Stewart banged the common sense out of dealmaker and Hollywood director Rupert Sanders, lust and strategy morphed into a steamy career move that should pay off for her big time. Since she already has her own money, she went for the Sugar Daddy business mentor who knows all the right people.
The latest news out of Hollywood is that jilted boyfriend Robert Pattinson wants a “man to man talk” with the 41-year-old director of Snow White and the Huntsman who stole his girl. The only snag here is that they’re one man short.
Sanders didn’t steal anything and Kristen Stewart really isn’t Pattinson’s girl; she’s her own girl. She opted to go for the savvy, aggressive, up-and-coming director as opposed to the pale and emaciated Pattinson who can’t do a thing for her career.
Kristen Stewart has plenty of cash, but she is smart enough to know that the gravy train fueled by those lousy vampire movies has derailed. She has her eyes on the future, and realizes that unless she steps up her game and hones in on more serious dramatic roles she’ll fall by the wayside and forever be known as the goth chick who used to be an actress. Even after a succession of serious box office blockbusters, every actress in the business is just one bad choice away from shooting digital porn in Silicone Valley Fun fact; 90% of America’s porn is produced in the San Fernando Valley or “San Pornando” for those of you who don’t know.
Stewart wants to be the next Elizabeth Taylor, a very admirable ambition, and in order to make that happen she must hook up with the Sugar Daddy that can deliver the right opportunities. In the short term this ambitious Sugar Baby is willing to break a few eggs to make an omelet.
So Stewart has apologized, Sanders has expressed his sincere regret (it almost sounded genuine) and the two of them are oh-so sorry for their momentary lapse of reason. The only one who hasn’t apologized is Robert Pattinson. If he was on top of his game and had his sights set higher, none of this would have happened. Then again, we at WSB wouldn’t have anything newsworthy to write about at 2:00 a.m.
Robert Pattinson rested on his teen-angst vampire laurels (those Twilight movies were really lame) instead of spearheading a new feature film or an innovative project that could keep their career momentum in high gear. Since Sugar Babies are far more intuitive than men, Kristen Stewart realized that their cozy house on the cul-de-sac was actually a dead end, and there was no way she was going to be held back by a pale slacker like Pattinson.
Then there’s the age difference that everyone is harping on. Stewart is 22, Sanders is 41 and Pattinson is 26. She’s at the turning point of her career, Sanders is at the age where directors really start to hit their stride and Pattinson is too old to play a high school vampire and too stupid to figure out what to do next. Pattinson left Stewart with no choice but to fend for herself and do what was best for her promising career. Plus, anyone who saw her as Joan Jett in The Runaways knows that she can really act.
Alternatively, Pattinson will be serving iced frappuccinos to overly-botoxed Beverly Hills wives (former Sugar Babies) at the Starbucks on Robertson Avenue for the rest of his lackluster existence. I saw him in a movie about a circus or something and it was so painfully dull that I opted to defrost my freezer because it was more entertaining.
If this assessment of the situation sounds harsh it’s because it is and so is life. Sugar Babies, if you don’t look out for yourselves in this cutthroat world no one else will. The alluring Stewart grabbed the bull by the horns, or more accurately, her boss by the dong, well-knowing that the short-term blowback would be inconsequential when compared to what Rupert Sanders can bring to the table in the years to come. If this isn’t the perfect example of a mutually beneficial relationship then what is?
Sanders didn’t engage in premeditated Sugar Daddy shenanigans, but he knew the lay of the land and that the fastest way to a young starlet’s vagina is through her career ambitions. Robert Evans, a legendary Sugar Daddy, did this for decades and nobody raised an eyebrow. There is no doubt there was serious chemistry between Stewart and Sanders, but that only accelerated a completely inevitable dynamic. If it wasn’t Sanders who got to dip his throbbing scepter into Stewart’s steaming love pie, it would have been James Cameron, Michael Bay, Quentin Tarantino or Brett Ratner (the Ratner thing might actually work).
Ultimately, who should we condemn and who should we exalt? Is Kristen Stewart a heartless tramp or a visionary dramatic actress? Is Rupert Sanders a cradle-robbing manipulator or simply a lucky bastard in the right vagina at the right time? Is Robert Pattinson a talentless hack? Is this blog running too long? We just don’t know.
These questions can only be answered by the outcome of the situation. In five years when Robert Pattinson is wearing a hair net and asking patrons at Oki’s Dog if they want fries with their sausage sandwich, and Kristen Stewart is accepting the Academy Award for her stunning portrayal of a drug-addicted lesbian madam in The Heidi Fleiss Story, no one is going to care less that this smart and sexy Sugar Baby took the initiative to swallow Rupert Sander’s pants python in the backseat of a Range Rover.
Sugar Babies, logon NOW to WealthSeeksBeauty.com and post your profile. Sugar Daddies, you should do the same.
You’ll be glad you did.
And Robert Pattinson, yes, we will take an order of fries with our Oki’s Dog.
I once read that a very expensive university study concluded that the majority of high school cheerleaders (female of course) have an overwhelming tendency to lock eyes with every Dad in the crowd at football games. As inconsequential as this may sound this practice is the very cornerstone of Sugar Daddy Dating and the way Sugar Babies and Sugar Daddies think.
When the cheerleaders were asked why they did this they all responded the same way, “We know we’re hotter than their wives and it makes us feel, well, powerful.”
No kidding, it’s true.
That sense of empowerment spreads far beyond cheerleaders and into the female gender as a whole. When women are hot they use it like a weapon. After all, guys do the same thing except that they flaunt their cash and power as opposed to their looks. If they’re lucky enough to have both, then they indeed make perfect Sugar Daddies.
While women will spend “time” making themselves more attractive, men spend “money” to accomplish the very same thing. So there you have it; society as a whole is hard wired for Sugar Daddy Dating. Now the stragglers and the uninformed just have to catch up.
Wealthy men buy cars, jewelry, ridiculously expensive suits and shoes to make it perfectly clear to the opposite sex that they have money to burn. Women adorn false eyelashes, hair extensions and endure a grueling array of cosmeceutical treatments ranging from pedicures, Brazilian waxes, breast augmentation, liposuction and collagen injections in order to fine tune their beauty. Men and women alike are biologically programmed to flaunt their plumage in order to find a superior mate, the alpha dog, the one that is better than the rest of the pack.
With the advent of cutting-edge beauty treatments and increasingly expensive man gear, natural selection has become a lot more competitive. Men push themselves beyond the point of clinical exhaustion in order to amass great fortunes, not so they can leave behind a remarkable legacy, but simply to get the hot chick.
In the 1950’s the very same guy would have settled for a steady job in order to attract a “practical” wife that could produce and care for 2.3 children (the technical definition of the nuclear family). Fast forward to 2012 and every man with functioning genitalia and a hard-on for Angelina Jolie is trying to create the next Facebook, make it in the NBA or be the next Donald Trump. Men make a paycheck while real men make history.
I credit the Internet and Cinemax soft porn for this re-energized brand of male motivation.
As for women, our beloved Sugar Babies to be exact, they have absolutely no interest in being practical. It’s downright boring. Sugar Babies crave excitement, luxury, and the finest things that western civilization has to offer. The $1,500 Louis Vuitton purse is no longer a luxury, it’s a mandatory accessory. Not surprisingly, the trend has gone global.
Behind Audi and BMW, Louis Vuitton is the third most-searched for luxury brand in China, according to a 2011 report by Digital Luxury Group. We at WSB do our homework.
In the 1950’s most women didn’t even drive, no less own a car. Today if you ask a Sugar Baby what her preferred mode of transportation is, the words BMW and Mercedes will fly from her pouty red lips faster than a bullet from an assassin’s rifle. And as for the 2.3 children, it’s out of the question until Sugar Daddy steps up and proves conclusively that Sugar Baby will never have to work again and there will positively be a nanny and a housekeeper to do the dirty work.
If the dynamic sounds selfish and narcissistic you may want to reevaluate your outlook on dating in general. You’ve most likely been brainwashed by the hordes of exceptionally unexceptional goons that wander through life like zombies, wallowing in mediocrity and passing over every golden opportunity while in search of a better frozen pizza.
Sugar Daddy Dating makes everyone try a little harder, look a little better and society benefits accordingly. Our process of natural selection has not been replaced, it’s been improved upon. Like anything else, from tadpoles to Bengal tigers, everything evolves, including the way we select a mate, or, more accurately, a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby.
If it were possible to turn back time and live the way our parents and grandparents did, would you even want to? Of course not; those people never had five minutes of fun and there was only one sexual position back then, missionary. The reverse cowgirl hadn’t been invented yet and oral was completely out of the question. The “good old days” were fraught with incessant boredom, complacency and a general state of malaise.
Just envision a man in the prime of his life, with basically no muscle tone (nobody worked out), even less aspirations, dressed in khakis and a correspondingly dull button-down shirt. He’s mindlessly pushing a lawn mower back and forth across the yard while his sexually muted spouse stares off into space while mixing a bowl of waffle batter. She knows that something is missing from their life in the suburbs but he’s happy because he’s too stupid to know any better. The few visionary Sugar Babies of the era moved to L.A. and the rest turned to Xanax.
Fortunately, turning back is not an option, so boldly move forward with supercharged enthusiasm and most importantly, be prepared to adapt or to become extinct. The choice is yours.
The rich want to be surrounded by opulence and stimulating sexual partners and the beautiful want what the rich have, so it all works out perfectly.
To sum it up, Wealth Seeks Beauty, and vice versa.
If you’re a real man, put your cards on the table and reach out to the most beautiful woman you can afford to accommodate. Claim a stunning Sugar Baby and reward yourself for all of your years of hard work, self-sacrifice and perseverance. You’ve earned it.
If you’re a gorgeous woman who’s never considered being a Sugar Baby, try something new and make yourself available to a man who has more spare money than free time. Your financial, and most likely your emotional needs, will be met in abundance. Considering that most “traditional” relationships are destroyed by arguments about money, making sure the money is already there is just common sense. More often than not, mutually beneficial relationships work.
Logon to WealthSeeksBeauty.com IMMEDIATELY and post your Sugar Daddy profile or your Sugar Baby personal ad. Live like the cameras are always rolling and you’re the star of your very own movie, be it a hardcore porno or a romantic comedy.
You’ll be glad you did.
You’ve invested a fair amount of time and effort in finding your perfect Sugar Daddy for that mutually beneficial relationship. It would be a shame to lose him because you’re a striking blonde but suddenly he’s in the mood for a fiery redhead or a striking brunette. Besides, there are dozens of aspects to your personality, so why shouldn’t each one have a distinct look?
Maybe Sugar Daddy wants a sexy stewardess, naughty librarian or sexually curious schoolgirl. Why let some other Sugar Baby capitalize on all of your hard work when you have the ability to change looks faster than Mystique from X-Men?
The solution is as close as your keyboard.
Thank God for Internet shopping. Websites such as Wigs.com, LingerieDiva.com and WilshireWigs.com offer a multitude of very sexy faux hair ranging from subtle to stunning. Their prices are reasonable and best of all they deliver right to your door.
Even more websites afford Sugar Babies the ability to adopt an alter ego. 3Wishes.com, SpicyLingerie.com, Yandy.com and Panties.com allow Sugar Babies to become a French maid, a sex-hungry cheerleader, hard-partying country girl, lusty genie, and last but definitely not least, nymphomaniac nurse. There are thousands of looks and combinations that can be created to satisfy any Sugar Daddy fantasy but it’s not all about him.
It’s equally exciting for the Sugar Baby to step out of her own skin so to speak, and become anything she can imagine. Man, woman or beast, everyone likes playing dress up. It’s entertaining, stimulating, conducive to creativity, and EMPOWERING.
Numerous University Studies have concluded that people will do things in a disguise that they would never even think about doing as themselves. Costumes, masks and wigs give Sugar Babies a heightened sense of empowerment and along with that comes sexually aggressive behavior. Let your wicked side come out and play once in a while, no one is going to complain.
Sugar Babies, don’t be shocked if you find yourself handcuffing Sugar Daddy to the bed posts a-la Fifty Shades of Grey when in real life you won’t even have sex with the lights on. Most Sugar Daddies need a little discipline both in and out of the bedroom and you’re just the right woman to get the job done. So don your newest alter ego and show Sugar Daddy who’s really in charge. He won’t beg for mercy; he’ll beg for more.
Sometimes, love hurts.
It’s liberating to put on a Wonder Woman costume and make Sugar Daddy talk by roping him with your Lasso of Truth. If you’re a little timid, a dirty cop uniform will help you get more aggressive. If you’re a classy business lady, donning the persona of a Vegas Stripper will allow you to shed those work-a-day doldrums and get wilder than Brooke Mueller without compromising your squeaky clean reputation in the real world.
You can ask rich Sugar Daddy what he’s into (boring) or you can spin the wheel, make your own decisions, and perpetually keep him guessing by always showing up with a new look. Not only will he be turned on to the point of a cerebral hemorrhage when he looks at you for the first time cracking a leather whip dressed as Catwoman, but the sheer anticipation of what you’ll come up with next will keep him thinking about you all day, every day. You’ve effectively claimed his largest sex organ, his brain.
The ability to morph into virtually any sexual fantasy is the greatest weapon in your Sugar Baby arsenal. However, like all good things (Moet, Xanax, sleeping until noon) being able to become whoever you want whenever you want is HIGHLY addictive. Once you start it is very easy for things to get out of control. Within a year of buying your first black bustier and playing Queen Colleen, the cruel dominatrix, you’ll have accumulated so many outfits and accessories that you’ll assuredly run out of storage space. Your spare bedroom will look like the wardrobe department at Paramount Pictures.
Plan ahead and have plenty of plastic storage bins at your disposal.
In addition, if you go on an unbridled costume bender without considering the expense involved you may have more money going out then coming in, at which point you’ve undermined the fundamental reason for Sugar Daddy Dating in the first place. Be unpredictable, creative and sexy but make sure your wardrobe investment is paying off at about ten to one. Best scenario is that you’re charging everything on Sugar Daddy’s Platinum Card to begin with.
Your new turnkey personas are only limited by your imagination and your sense of style so be bold, daring and try something you’ve never done before. If you don’t step out of your comfort zone once in a while you’ll eventually become bored with yourself, and Sugar Daddy will quickly follow suit. Until you give it a go a few times and take the world by storm in a sexy Satan costume you’ll never know what you’re missing.
Logon to WealthSeeksBeauty.com right now, post your profile and get ready to play carnal Candy Striper to an adoring and highly appreciative Sugar Daddy. If you’re going to blow his money you should at least blow his mind.
You’ll be glad you did.
Ladies, feel empowered. Sugar Babies are a hot commodity and the treasure shouldn’t do the hunting.
Certain premises from the plain vanilla dating world directly apply to Sugar Daddy Dating as well. Sugar Daddies always want what they can’t have (or what they think they can’t have), and YOU are the one in control of the situation, regardless of how broke you are or how badly you want that new 700 Series BMW so you can make all of your gal pals sick with envy.
Women are emotionally complex, mysterious and generally enigmatic. Men, Sugar Daddies in this case, are basically well-meaning but predictable creatures with two moving parts. When held in comparison, you’re bringing a gun to a snowball fight when you encounter Sugar Daddy for the first time. The pressure is on HIM, not you, to prove beyond the shadow of a doubt that he’s worthy of your time and affection. Sugar Daddy has basically one shot to get it right and he knows it. If he doesn’t make a smooth approach and treat you like an absolute princess you are assuredly going to move on to your next potential benefactor.
We at WSB get a lot of field reports from first time Sugar Babies. Some come outright and ask our staff for assistance in selecting a Sugar Daddy that’s juuuuust right. We don’t do that here since we’re not a matchmaking service, but we will guide you in the right direction if you have specific questions. We can’t address all of them here but we’ll take a crack at knocking out the most common queries.
Where should I meet my potential Sugar Daddy for the first time?
This one has no single correct answer because everyone has different social habits. Some Sugar Babies prefer a get together in a casual environment while others have a little more gusto and are willing to commit to a full-blown dinner date at a five-star restaurant. The choice is yours; do what you are most comfortable with and don’t ignore your instincts.
Precursor emails, texts and phone conversations are going to provide you with a pretty good idea of what Sugar Daddy is all about. Fine tune your radar and trust your intuition. Even if you’re new to Sugar Daddy Dating you’ve certainly had blind dates. There’s no real difference.
Odds are if you’ve agreed to a face-to-face with Sugar Daddy you’ve developed a certain level of comfort already, but plan for the unexpected just in case your prince turns out to be a toad or worse yet, a pauper. Leave yourself an easy way out (a pre-determined bailout plan) if you’re just not feeling it. Be polite, charming and witty and most of all be yourself, but don’t hesitate to cut things short if Sugar Daddy is giving you a bad vibe or if he’s simply not for you. It’s the same reason that fighter jets come with ejector seats. If the date is heading sideways pull the emergency handle, blow the hatch and parachute to dry land.
How soon should I bring up the subject of money?
Good question. This one requires you to think on your feet so you’ve got to be on the lookout for your “in.” Odds are, since men are out to impress, he’ll broach the subject first so the ball is automatically in your proverbial court. If he rambles on aimlessly and finances never come up don’t hesitate to be straightforward. Men love it, unless they’re broke at which point the dynamic is doomed and you fall back on your previously discussed escape plan.
Some good language to use when breaking the ice about money and what you want out of the arrangement is “So what did you have in mind about making this work?”
I love this one because it’s a question and not a statement. It’s an open-ended query that forces him to make the opening bid for your time and companionship. If Sugar Daddy needs clarification as to what “making this work” means, your response should be “You know, finances.” It’s a classy response and puts the cards on the table without sounding like you intend to get paid by the hour for services rendered.
In most cases this fiscal foot in the door will spark a productive, seductive and even entertaining conversation about what you both expect out of the Sugar Daddy Arrangement. Have some fun with it. The ice is officially broken and odds are you’ll both have a few laughs spelling out the parameters of the arrangement.
Most people are raised to believe that talking about money is some sort of social taboo, like inviting Michael Vick to watch your Pomeranian while you’re out of town. This is simply ridiculous and if you’re embarrassed to talk about money you’ll never have any.
The world itself revolves on an axis of money, your dear old Dad came home from work talking about money, three quarters of the nightly news is about money, people incessantly complain about money, etc. For such a taboo subject it seems to be a topic that is on everyone’s lips so just spell it out. No one likes beating around the bush (no offense) or being on the receiving end of someone who is beating around the bush (that’s the last bush reference).
Getting what you want is easy once you know what you want.
What if Sugar Daddy expects sex immediately?
This one is touchy because we at WSB don’t dictate morality. If sparks are flying, go for it. If you’re feeling pressured or uncomfortable in any way then obviously the answer is a resounding NO.
Sex is one of those things that takes up the least amount of time and produces the most anxiety and/or excitement, depending on your own sex drive and of course, the person you’re with. Sugar Daddy Dating is still dating so go for what you know and behave in the same manner as if there was no money on the table so to speak. Whether or not you have sex with Sugar Daddy on the spot is probably not going to damage the potential for a successful Sugar Daddy Arrangement so don’t be fooled into thinking you have to get it on to go along.
If he’s a slick operator and has a good head of hair you might want to cut lunch short and head straight for the nearest Marriot, his place, the backseat of a rental car, so on and so forth. If he’s a drooling troll with one thing on his mind you’re not going to turn him into your ideal Sugar Daddy anyway by giving him fast-track access to the steaming honey pot.
In summary, do what you think is best, don’t pretend to be something you’re not (it’s a drag for all parties involved) and RELAX, there’s more than one Sugar Daddy out there that’s a perfect fit for your lifestyle. Or, you can go back to traditional dating and face the same exact quandaries with a guy that most likely can’t pay for lunch.
When all is said is done, “He who has the gold makes the rules,” and Sugar Babies, you’re the ones with the gold.
Logon to WealthSeeksBeauty.com right now and post your profile. Your Dream Daddy is out there and we’ve already done most of the legwork for you.
You’ll be glad you did.
We all know the saying “Looks Good on Paper.” Simply put, based on the statistical and empirical data available and your good old horse sense your Sugar Baby hookup should be a total thrill ride; but for one reason or another things just don’t gel. Looks Good on Paper never fails to disappoint.
Example. . .
Let’s say you meet a Sugar Baby who is fifteen minutes over the age of consent (we’re talking Alabama consent), she’s a part-time dancer (not ballet), exhibits no identifiable emotional issues, and her dual purpose in life is to look slamming hot and make your heart palpitate at the mere sight of her; sounds great, right?
But after a couple of outings and possibly even a hot and heavy round of putt putt hotel lust you’re already bored. She should have electrified you for at least one fiscal quarter or until someone hotter came along but this particular sexcapade died on the vine long before it should have. What the hell went wrong?
Don’t overthink it; we’ve all been there.
The brick wall that Sugar Daddy ran into is a common one. Unless you’re accustomed to dating younger Sugar Babies, way younger, you forgot to consider that her sum total of life experience consists of stuff that happened in high school or what went wrong at the club the night before.
So the conundrum presents itself; do you go for more “age appropriate” Sugar Babies (whatever that means), or do you just suck it up and endure the sporadic boredom so as to enjoy the physical benefits of dating a Sugar Baby young enough to be your daughter? We all know you’re going for option “B” so don’t be a hypocrite. But the real answer is both and neither. You can have your cake and take it to Cancun for the weekend too.
The Sugar Daddy Dating game’s best kept secret is that young Sugar Babies with a kid (singular) are hotter and more interesting than their freewheeling counterparts. They may not have planned on getting pregnant at seventeen but they were forced to grow up fast and possess a hyper-developed passionate depth and soulful resonance.
Let’s break it down. You want someone at your beckon call who will do pretty much what you want when you want without you having to bend over backwards to reciprocate. You want attention, compliments and someone to rub you the right way and/or spank you when you’ve been a bad boy. Sounds like the same things a child wants if you ask me brother (no disrespect).
The single mother has garnered a lifetime of Sugar Baby expertise in a short period of time without even knowing it. She’s had a crash course in life experience while most females her age are still trying to figure out how to drive a stick shift. Best of all she still has that brand new Sugar Baby smell and a body so tight you can bounce a Krugerrand off of it. She knows how to coddle, care for and entertain you even if you’re having an off day, a little cranky and need a bottle.
Also, she’s dying to party.
She missed out on a thousand all-nighters when her nubile gal pals we’re getting hammered on peppermint schnapps in Daytona Beach for Spring Break. Single Mother Sugar Baby never got those crazy teen years out of her system and there’s a whole slew of stuff she never got to do because the condom broke that one fateful night in the backseat of the Camaro.
She’s just what the doctor ordered and she’s got plenty of good years ahead of her. This brand of Sugar Baby is extremely appreciative of ANY romantic gesture you make and she’s hell bent on making up for lost time. Most importantly, she’s very mature for her age and can conduct herself in polite company as well as she can in an underground nightclub.
I know, you first-time or soon-to-be Sugar Daddies aren’t buying any of this, after all, you’re dating a Sugar Baby because she’s gorgeous and you’re not in it for the witty retort. The seasoned Sugar Daddy knows better though. He’s been around the Sugar Scene long enough to know that unless Sugar Baby can keep him stimulated on a mental level it’s going to be a lackluster relationship at best.
So you still don’t believe me. You’re afraid there is going to be some sort of hassle or responsibility that comes along with dating a Sugar Baby with a baby. She’ll end up cancelling at the last minute because the baby has the croup or, worse yet, she’s going to try to rope you into a full-time, down and dirty traditional relationship, the very thing you left behind when you signed on to become a Sugar Daddy.
The fact of the matter is that you’ll most likely never see the kid anyway. Single Mother Sugar Baby has an aunt, sister, best friend and a dozen other people who are just dying to watch that kid at the drop of a hat. Single Mother Sugar Baby is still all yours and the kid is more of an urban legend as opposed to another mouth to feed.
We at WSB don’t ask Sugar Babies whether or not they have kids when they’re posting their profiles, nor should we because it’s a completely classless question and simply none of our business. Consequently, don’t be surprised if three months into a flawless Sugar Baby relationship your benefactress tells you that she is not flying solo.
Logon to WealthSeeksBeauty.com immediately and post your profile, be you Sugar Daddy, Sugar Baby or just someone seeking a little consensual adventure. At the end of the day, it just feels good to support a single mother, especially if she looks like Megan Fox.
You’ll be glad you did.
Gents, we’re all aware of the fact that you’re still financially kicking ass in one of the worst domestic economies in history; you’ve got money to burn. But while you guys are swilling gin and tonics on the golf course at 10:00 a.m. and partying with smoking hot ladies three at a time, we at WSB are burning the midnight oil. Our Sugar Lifestyle Research Team (SLERT) is doing what they do best; bringing you original, well-researched mostly true Sugar Baby advice, insightful information and a lot of other good ammo you’ll be able to use to close escrow.
The term “Sugar Daddy” is taken for granted, greatly misused and generally misunderstood. Critics claim it’s a shady handle intended to cloak the act of prostitution, which is a load of manure. So now we’re going to clear the air once and for all and bring everyone up to speed, including all of the naysayers.
Once everyone knows the real truth behind the birth of the term “Sugar Daddy” the overall concept will gain even greater credibility. Then we can all get back to having real fun and getting naked with anonymous strangers.
Think about it. There are thousands of different monikers that could have been coined to describe a sophisticated guy who can afford to pay for the attention of a young, nubile female. Until this very moment though, not even the most renowned sociologists knew the true origin of the term.
During the Renaissance the great minds of the time cracked open a keg of Dago red and realized that there was no singular term that defined what is now known as the Sugar Daddy.
Machiavelli got the ball rolling since he had already been drinking for most of the day. He threw out the term “Master of All Hot Tomatoes.” Yes indeed, women were referred to as “Tomatoes” as far back as the Age of Enlightenment. Machiavelli, or Big Mack as he was known to his drinking buddies, never really hooked up that much even after penning “The Prince” so his input was quickly dismissed by the group.
Giotto took time out from drawing the perfect circle and held up a glyph depicting a trident skewering a ripe tomato (again with the tomatoes). It was deemed a little aggressive, too conceptual and downright creepy. Ultimately, it could not be conveyed in conversation without picking up a charcoal pencil and a sketch pad. The Renaissance Masters hit yet another dead end.
Michelangelo di Lodovico Buonarroti Simoni (holy crap that’s a mouthful of meatballs), AKA Michelangelo or the Tomato Magnet, held steadfast in his belief that the Sugar Daddy concept didn’t require a catchy handle since the guys we’re paying for everything anyway. It just goes to show you that even one of the greatest Renaissance men was capable of making such a rudimentary mistake. His contribution to the group was worthless and Vatican records confirm that he complained throughout the entire meeting because he was missing work. Fun fact – he never had sex again and went blind.
Akbar the Great flew in from India for the meeting but no one could understand what the hell he was talking about. Historians agree he just showed up for the free booze and the caprese salad.
It was then, when all hope seemed lost, that Leonardo Da Vinci grabbed the reigns, bitch slapped Michelangelo (that’s another story) and said his piece.
Paraphrasing, “We live in the Age of Enlightenment bros. Advancements in science, technology, medicine and philosophy have elevated us from the darkness into an exhilarating era; one which will yield unimaginable discoveries and the ability to hook up with juicy, ripe young tomatoes whenever we want as long as we keep pulling down the coin. I’m not just speaking about one tomato, I mean as assload of hot tomatoes and I don’t know about you punks but I work like 18 hours a day so I don’t have a lot of free time for the usual wining, dining it takes to get my sway on. We eat tomatoes because they are sweet, we are the fathers of this new and exciting period in history and consequently, from this day forward, we shall be called Sugar Daddies.”
The whole speech sounds a lot cooler in Latin.
So that was it. The man who gave us the flying machine, the armored car and the eight-barreled machine gun, coined the term Sugar Daddy. It was arguably his greatest contribution to Western Civilization.
So why did Leonardo’s idea prevail while the rest of the brainiacs came up short? The answer is simple; he truly appreciated women.
Let’s not forget that Leonardo spent most of his time surrounded by “muses,” painting legendary masterpieces of beautiful women like the Mona Lisa, the Virgin on the Rocks and his portrait of Isabella d’Este.
He is also credited with drafting detailed schematics of the human body but it was actually the female body that was on his mind. Leonardo’s advantage was his third testicle nick-named “Rico” that produced so much testosterone it took six guys to close his coffin when he died from a relentless priapism on May 2, 1519.
So that’s it. The term “Sugar Daddy” (and correspondingly “Sugar Baby”) was minted by one of the greatest minds to ever exist.
The only thing smarter than Leonardo’s brainchild catch phrase is for you to sign up immediately at WealthSeeksBeauty.com and post your Sugar Daddy profile. Of course, we need as many tomatoes as possible so Sugar Babies should logon immediately as well.
You’ll be glad you did.
Don’t despair, the weather may be inclement but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a virtual carnival of fun inside your two-bedroom flat with your brand new Sugar Baby. I’m a firm believer in working with what you got and making your own fun wherever you go, so bring on the bad weather and the close confines; I’ll figure out a way to have the time of my life as long as I got the hottie with the body bought and paid for by my side.
First of all, don’t delude yourself into thinking you’re going to have sex all day. At best, I mean best, you’ll kill an hour or two so you may want to save the carnal shenanigans for the grand finale.
Don’t Overlook the Obvious
If you’re seeing a Latin or Asian Sugar Baby simply crack open a bottle of wine and let these chicks do what they do best – - CLEAN. Sure, some of you are going to be offended but this a cultural statement, not a racist one. Anyone who has ever dated a woman of Eastern, Central American or South American descent knows that these women can clean like banshees. I mean toothbrush and baking soda in the corner of your stall shower type clean. Most importantly, they love it. It’s their way of showing Sugar Daddy their appreciation.
In certain cultures, not Western, cleanliness is a personal reflection of a women’s self-esteem. While American Barbies look at cleaning the same way they view anal, Asian and Latin Sugar Babies are empowered by a clean house. They take pride in their ability to make your man cave spotless, plus it gives them an opportunity to snoop around so everyone comes out a winner unless you’ve got a drawer full of trophy panties you’d rather keep under lock and key.
A Sugar Baby in Motion Stays in Motion
Like most Sugar Daddies I like to stay fit, I mean triathlon fit, so it takes a rather toned Sugar Baby to keep up. I don’t expect a sparring partner at the boxing gym but I will accept no less than a Sugar Baby that can go toe-to-toe with me on a four-wall racquetball court.
Unfortunately, the weather being what it is, unless you’ve got access to an indoor racquet club it’s simply not going to happen, Fortunately, our good friends at Wii have so many racquet-based gaming programs to choose from that you’re bound to find one you can play with your Sugar Baby.
Move the coffee table to the side, get the breakables out of the way and have Sugar Baby dress appropriately for the racquetball marathon of the digital age; recommended attire being a thong and quarter-cup bra. If you’ve never played virtual racquetball or tennis on the widescreen you’ll be amazed at how much of a sweat you’ll work up. It’s awesome and you get to smoke and drink at the same time so it’s the best of all worlds.
One helpful piece of advice is to make sure both you and your Sugar Baby are wearing the obligatory wrist straps for the remotes or you will end up breaking some glass (possibly even the widescreen itself) or worst yet give your Sugar Baby a black eye or get one yourself.
So the day is half over and there’s no break in the cloud cover. It looks like it’s going to be a rainy New York night. Believe me, there is nothing worse than trying to hail a cab in the rain in Manhattan; it’s Dante’s tenth circle of hell.
Sex, Wine and Videotape
So flip the switch and create the polar opposite. Tell Sugar Baby to call over three or four of her closest gal pals for some online underwear shopping. After all, you’re buying and ultimately you’ll be locked inside a two bedroom apartment with a foursome of wine-infused hotties. The possibilities are infinite.
Do a little quick math and figure about four bottles of wine per head and the best part is that if your calculations are off, wine doesn’t go bad. Just throw it on the rack and let it age gracefully. As a professional Sugar Daddy it’s generally recommended to keep at least a case of red and white on hand at all times anyway.
If it turns out that Sugar Baby’s Sugar Babies are not WSB members, tell them to take a break from Panties.com and set up a profile immediately at WealthSeeksBeauty.com.
One last piece of advice; always, I mean always, keep that video camera charged and tripod readily accessible. You’ll never know when an ordinarily uneventful rainy Sunday turns into a raging flesh fest. These are the touching moments you’ll want to preserve for your grandkids to enjoy in years to come.
Sugar Babies and Sugar Daddies, post a profile at WealthSeeksBeauty.com right now.
You’ll be glad you did.
In a few short weeks the eyes of the world will converge on London to be part of one of mankind’s greatest spectacles, the 30th Olympic Summer Games. Sure there is boxing, Tae Kwon Do, Wrestling, Fencing and a bunch of other crap, but we at WSB feel compelled to spice things up a bit and propose our own Sugar Baby Summer Olympics.
Opening Ceremony – The Lighting of the Newports
Carrying that Olympic torch all the way from Greece is a little played out, and since they’ll let just about anyone carry it these days through a series of no-name Podunk towns, the ceremony has lost its mystique. We at WSB say that a thousand or so bikini-clad Sugar Babies should simply form a tight circle around the Mirage fountains in Las Vegas and then, at the sharp crack of a starter pistol, each one reaches to her right and lights the Newport of the Sugar Baby standing next to her.
They all exhale simultaneously and as the giant cloud of refreshing menthol smoke rises into the night sky – THE GAMES ARE ON!
The Sugar Baby Olympics are based on simplicity, so we only have two events. In all seriousness the traditional Summer Games are boring as hell and go on waaaaay too long. We stress the basics in order to find that next Gold Medal Sugar Baby without taking a month out of your life.
Compulsory Event – The 50 Meter Dash to the Ladies Room in High Heels
Sugar Daddies, there is no more effective way to separate a professional Sugar Baby from a rank amateur than to watch one of these hotties sprint for the can in six-inch stilettos while carrying a Cosmopolitan. Sugar Babies will not only be judged on time, but poise, drink spillage and whether or not they make it look easy will play a large part in the scoring process.
Since this is a compulsory event the ranks will be cut quickly. Only the most adept Sugar Babies will make it to the next event so expect a lot of drama and heartbreak as at least two or three of these Babies goes lame and snaps a high heel or simply faceplants when transitioning from tile floor onto carpeting.
Sugar Baby Triathlon – Freebie Cab Ride, New Smart Phone, and Mortgage Payment from a Stranger
We’ve listed these similar tasks in order of difficulty beginning with the easiest one first. All events are timed so Sugar Baby is not just competing against an array of gorgeous competitors; she’s playing against the clock as well.
We go to SOHO, the neighborhood surrounding Balthazar in New York. It’s a dynamite part of town and you’re likely to bump into anyone from Tim Roth to Yoko Ono but unless you’re a hot female, no one is doing you any favors. After all, New York is still New York.
Sugar Baby selects the sultriest outfit in her arsenal and must accomplish three tasks between the hours of 9:00 p.m. and midnight – simple enough.
First, Sugar Baby must convince a complete stranger that for whatever reason she has no money (wallet was stolen, forgot to cash a check, whatever) and that she needs $100 for cab fare to get to the upper west side. Sure, it’s only a $40 cab ride at worst, but Sugar Baby must get a total stranger to willingly fork over a C Note.
Sugar Daddy will most likely come back with, “Why not take my ride?” or “I was going in that direction anyway,” but that simply isn’t going to win round one. It is imperative that Sugar Baby keeps her eye on the prize and insist that it’s a cab ride she must take alone, sort of like a victory lap at the Daytona 500.
Regardless of how she does it, she’s gotta get it done, and she must stick to the cab story as well. If she deviates and asks for money for birth control or mood stabilizers she’s automatically disqualified.
The Sell Phone
With $100 in hand, Sugar Baby must now step up her game.
Equipped with only a SIM card a lost-little-girl expression on her pouty red lips, she must convince ANOTHER stranger (not the same fish) that her smart phone has died and she needs $500 to replace it within the hour or she’ll lose her job. She is not allowed to specify what she does for a living and may only disclose that her career demands that she works odd hours and that her boss is a lunatic.
Since New York is riddled with 24-hour electronics stores it is completely plausible that someone can replace a Smart Phone at a late hour so the request indeed holds water, it’s just a matter of whether or not Sugar Baby has the talent to get Sugar Daddy to dig deep and come up with $500 considering the fact that they’ve just met.
Level Two is where most Sugar Babies get blown out. They get a lot of responses like, “Why don’t we take care of this in the morning?” or “Use my phone, I’m sure your boss can’t be that bad.” Level Two is a brick wall for the amateur Sugar Baby because she doesn’t know how to overcome objection. As soon as Sugar Daddy turns her down she has the reflex reaction to move onto another seemingly sympathetic benefactor.
Cheat Code: Stick with the same guy and calmly overcome his objections; you’re odds of success increase dramatically because you are demonstrating sincerity and building a stronger rapport with every passing minute.
Ultimate Challenge – Pay My Mortgage Daddy
If tasks one and two were completed in even a reasonable amount of time, it’s got to be about 10:45 p.m. by now. Anyone at the club has a decent Scotch buzz going and as blood alcohol levels increase, attention spans decrease. Sugar Baby has to bring her “T & A” game in order to identify the right Sugar Daddy and then pour on the charm in order to grab the Holy Grail of Sugar Daddy endowments; Daddy, can you pay my mortgage (rent, etc.)?
Sure, $1,800 may not be a lot of money to most people, but even the hottest Sugar Baby has to have one slick rap in order to extract that amount of legal tender from a perfect stranger in SOHO around midnight.
Sure the task may seem daunting, but every Sugar Daddy knows that the housing market is still in the toilet and that most Sugar Babies are generally cash strapped.
We at WSB have heard it all over the years so it would be a little unfair of us to start doling out secret sure-fire Sugar Daddy manipulation techniques, but the one thing we will say is speak from the heart ladies. Sincerity wins out over begging every time. There’s a fine line between being embarrassed and embarrassing.
The Finish Line
Hopefully, we mean hopefully, at least of you have crossed the finish line before midnight and have about $2,500 in your pocket, give or take. Relish in your success Sugar Babies, you’ve earned it. A lesser Sugar Baby would have folded hours ago but you hung in there, traversing unforeseen obstacles and overcoming even the most absurd Sugar Daddy excuses. You’re a bonafide Gold Medal Sugar Baby.
Unlike the 2012 Summer Olympics whose participants will be rigorously tested for hundreds of different performance enhancing drugs, we at WSB work more on the honor system.
Best of all, last time we checked, Citron Vodka, Restylane and Altoids weren’t on any sports commissions’ banned substance list. So jump in Sugar Babies, take the WSB Olympic challenge and see if you’ve got what it takes to bring home the gold. Or, at the very least, post your Sugar Baby Profile at WealthSeeksBeauty.com.
You’ll be glad you did.